Why 3D Kinda Sucks

So 3D is officially the “it” thing in Hollywood right now.  Studios have a myriad of reasons to like this new fad.

Firstly, they make more money per ticket.  That extra $3 per ticket starts to add up pretty quickly.

Secondly, it reduces piracy, for obvious reasons.

Thirdly, it’s relatively inexpensive to convert a movie to 3D, compared to the amount of guaranteed money they’ll make.

So there’s really no reason for them not to hastily convert everything possible to 3D, no matter how much it needs it or not.  There are those in the film community who despise the thought of 3D, and view it as the downfall of cinema.  Which it may very well be, but there were those who said the same thing when sound was introduced to silent films and color was brought to black and white movies.

So really, 3D could be the future of movies, but as it stands right now, it won’t be.  Or at the very least, I hope it won’t be.

Why is that?

First, those glasses.  Those freaking glasses.  They’re awkward enough on me (they kept slipping off when I watch The Green Hornet), but they’re even worse on anybody who has glasses.

Second, it’s too gimmicky.  3D technology in movies has the capacity to change the filmgoing experience, but it’s content to misuse its power.  What do I mean by that?  Movies shot in 3D have the ability to bring depth to the picture, thereby making landscapes come to life and truly bring the viewer into the movie (see Avatar and How To Train Your Dragon, both used it masterfully).  But as it stands right now, most 3D movies just throw shit at you.  The worst example being Beowulf.  There is one particular shot where somebody points a spear at the camera, and the camera holds on that point of view shot way longer than it should have, as if to say “HEY, LOOK AT THIS! ISN’T IT AWESOME HOW WE CAN DO THIS WITH 3D?”

3D could change the way we watch movies.  But right now it kinda sucks.

For Attebiz Movie Reviews, I’m the J-Man

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